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Is your spouse a narcissist? Expect your divorce to be complicated

| Mar 29, 2021 | Family Law

Individuals who have a narcissistic spouse might soon realize that the marriage isn’t going to work. Unfortunately, making the decision to split up doesn’t mean that things are going to be any easier. A narcissist is likely to make the process of divorce a nightmare. 

Trying to deal with the narcissistic individual while you’re going through a divorce takes some planning. You need to think about how you will handle the various aspects of what the narcissist is likely to do. Here are some things you can expect from your soon-to-be-ex:

Dragging the proceedings on

Narcissists need to feel powerful, so they try to control everything. They may do things that drag the court battle on. Not only does this make them feel like they’re running the show, but they also likely assume that it’s costing you money. Thinking they are making you miserable will make them feel better. 

Making up stories

Narcissists don’t see reality in the same way as the rest of the world. Because of this, they will lie about what’s going on to try to get others to see things in their way — and they’re often quite convincing. You should keep proof, such as receipts, of anything that pertains to the divorce. This may help you to show the truth, when necessary.

Playing games for power

A narcissist gets a sense of power from the reactions of distress, anger, frustration or fear that they get from their target — and that target, for now, is you. Try to find ways that you can avoid showing your feelings. This might mean that you limit communication during the divorce. Your attorney can help you to determine what methods might prove useful — or even serve as a buffer.

If you’re contemplating divorce from a narcissist, you need to speak with an attorney about your concerns early to best develop a coherent strategy for your future.

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